You owe me a drink (why) because your so ugly I dropped mine.

What’s long and black? (Pause) The KFC line.

If Internet Explorer is brave enough to ask you to be your default browser, I’m brave enough to ask you out!

Didn’t You Wear That Yesterday?

Your eyes are as blue as the sea I dumped my ex’s body in.

I’m willing to lower my standards if you’re going on a date with me.

Damn Girl is your name Wifi ? Because I’m feeling a connection!

You are almost as hot as my mom.

How much does it cost to date you? Cause damn, you look expensive!

Your Face [Pause] I like that shit!