You dropped something! What? (Point at the ground) Your standards.

I’m new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?

I want you to have my children (pause) GREAT! They are in the car outside..

Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them.

Come live in my heart, and pay no rent.

Crap. Something is wrong with my cell phone. {Oh Really. What is that?} Its just that…your numbers not in it.

Babe! you look so fine I could drink your bath water!

Are you going to kiss me or do I have to lie to my diary?